Naruto Gone Wild
by Ohfortheloveofpete
Summary: Konohamaru learns a valuable lesson about making Naruto characters act OOC.
1. Chapter 1: Hilarity Ensues

Naruto Gone Wild

_Yes, I've decided to do a Naruto fanfic...as you're probably aware, there are a lot of people that like making the characters in the series do random and utterly absurd things...and generally act crazy._

_Well guess what? A little boy named Konohamaru happens to be one of these people... and he has built a raygun that can make Naruto characters act terminally OOC...how did he build one you ask? You can try to figure that out after you've discovered how many licks it takes to get to the center of the Tootsie Roll Pop. Personally I'm too lazy to count, so anyways, let's watch the chaos the mischevious boy causes._

**Chapter 1: Hilarity Ensues**

Things were rather pleasant in Konohagakure today. The sun was shining, there wasn't a cloud in the sky, and of course, there weren't insane ninjas trying to burn the place to the ground. Suffice to say things were pretty peaceful.

In fact, one such boy was enjoying some delicous ramen. Who was it you ask? Why it was none other than Naruto, who as we all knew named the series after himself because of his ego.

"Believe it!" bellowed Naruto.

Of course, for some strange reason, whenever Konohagakure was particularly peaceful, something bad always happened to ruin everyone's day. This was one of those unfortunate times, as everyone would soon find out.

Anyways, Naruto was just about to return home when he noticed that there was a letter in his mailbox. Who was it from you ask? Why, it was none other than a letter from his apprentice Konohamaru.

"Interesting..." he thought. Curious, he decided to read the letter to see if there was anything he should know.

Dear Naruto,

I made something cool! I want you to come by my place and see it! You've just gotta come! It's going to surprise you!

Sincerely,

Konohamaru

"That's it? He wants me to come over to his house so that he can show me something? Fair enough." thought Naruto as he went to visit his apprentice.

Suffice to say, Konohamaru was rather pleased to see his master. Naruto noticed that he had a strange device in his hands.

"Yes! You're finally here! Now I can test out my new ray gun!" exclaimed Konohamaru.

"You built a ray gun? I wish I had one...but what does it do?" inquired Naruto.

"It makes whoever gets hit by it act terminally out of character." explained the boy.

"Out of character? What are you talking about?" inquired the ninja.

"It makes people act in ways that they would normally never dream of doing." answered Konohamaru.

"OK then." said Naruto, still a little confused.

"Come back a few minutes later and I'll give you a demonstration." said the boy.

Naruto nodded as he went back home.

_A few minutes later..._

"So...about your raygun, how exactly did you make it?" questioned Naruto. "To be honest, I don't think I've ever really seen anything like it."

"Do I have to explain?" inquired Konohamaru.

Naruto sighed.

"Well, if you're not going to explain how you made it...why did you make it?" inquired the genin.

"I just thought that it would be hilarious to test it out on another ninja..." said Konohamaru.

"Wait, we're going to use this on other ninja?!" questioned Naruto.

"Of course! That's what it's for! Who else did you think we were going to use it on?" exclaimed the boy.

"I'm starting to have second thoughts about this..." said the genin, not wanting to hurt his friends.

"Can we at least give him a test run? I really want to test it out!" stated Konohamaru.

"If you insist.." nodded Naruto.

"Hooray!" he cheered.

"So, who are we testing it on anyway?" questioned the genin.

"Oh, just that girl sitting over there on a bench." answered Konohamaru.

Naruto looked around, and discovered that it was none other than his friend Hinata.

"Wait? Hinata? I don't know...she always seems to go through a lot as it is." said Naruto.

"Oh please oh please oh please oh please!" begged Konohamaru.

"Fine. But I sure hope that you have some way to return her back to normal." nodded the genin.

"Oh sure...I have a reverse switch on it so that we can undo whatever damages it causes." answered the boy.

"A reverse switch? Thank goodness..." said the genin.

"Mm-hmm...now then, why don't you go talk to her so that she'll hold still?" inquired Konohamaru.

Naruto shrugged and decided to do what Konohamaru told him.

"Um, hi?" inquired Naruto.

Hinata's face turned red. She looked rather startled.

"Um, hi Naruto! How are you doing today?!" exclaimed Hinata.

"Fine, you?" inquired Naruto.

"I'm doing fine!" answered Hinata.

Suddenly, Konohamaru fired the OOC Ray Gun. Immediately, Hinata was surrounded by a strange red light.

Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"Um, you OK?" inquired the ninja.

Hinata promptly stared at him...with a smile on her face. She suddenly licked her lips.

"You are so freaking hot..." flirted Hinata.

"Um, what?" inquired Naruto.

Suddenly, Hinata reached forward...and gave Naruto an enormous kiss on the lips. Blood suddenly began to leak about Naruto's nose.

"See you later!" exclaimed Hinata as she ran away. Naruto's face promptly turned pink.

"OK...Hinata's acting weird...and that wasn't really what I was expecting my first kiss to be..." thought Naruto.

He then realized what Konohamaru had done.

"Oh that's right...that's what his ray gun does...why did I forget that?" thought Naruto.

Konohamaru ran up to him shortly afterwards.

"Wasn't it awesome? I want to play with some more!" exclaimed Konohamaru.

"Um, listen...I admit that in the past I've done a lot of pranks...but you're basically using that ray gun to brainwash us all into humilating ourselves! If I were you I'd throw that ray gun away...and while you're at it...change Hinata back!" exclaimed Naruto.

"Fine." grumbled the boy as he went to find Hinata and the nearest trash can.

"Sheesh...I don't know what's gotten into him..." thought the genin.

_A few hours later..._

Konohamaru was rather frustrated to say the very least. He had spent much of his free time building a machine that would drastically change the personalities of others, only for his master to reject it and demand that he throw it in the garbage. Life was so unfair.

And he had no luck finding Hinata...where could she have possibly gone? Surely she had to be around Konohagakure somewhere...but considering how big it was, it was like looking for a needle in a haystack.

He then noticed that her teammates Shino and Kiba were nearby...maybe he could ask them?

But as it turned out, they were as curious as he was as to where Hinata had gone. They were in fact currently having a conversation with each other. He decided to spy on them through some nearby bushes.

"Have you seen Hinata? She didn't show up at training today." said Kiba.

"I'm afraid not. I sure hope she turns up soon." agreed Shino.

"I agree with you Shino...where on Konohagakure could she possibly be?" inquired Kiba.

Their question was suddenly answered when their old comrade paid them a visit.

"Hey boys!" exclaimed Hinata.

Kiba's mouth dropped in shock. As it turned out, Hinata had discarded her sweater and was now wearing a red strapless bikini. Also, for some strange reason, she was also running around barefoot.

"What the-" said Kiba.

"Did I mention how handsome you two look today?" inquired Hinata.

Shino's cheeks turned pink.

"Um, Hinata, did something hit you on the head?" asked Shino.

"What? No! I'm fine!" exclaimed Hinata.

"Then why are you dressed like that?" inquired Kiba.

"So I can show off my perfect body! Duh! Now if you excuse me I'm going to go flirt with some hot boys..." said Hinata as she walked away.

"Sheesh, I wonder what's gotten into her..." questioned Shino.

"I know...she used to be so shy...did some ray gun zap her and rewire her brain or something?" agreed Kiba.

Konohamaru sweatdropped. Nonetheless, he found what he had done to Hinata to be hilarious. In fact, he couldn't stop giggling.

"Do you hear something?" inquired Shino.

"Funny, it sounds like someone laughing...weird." agreed Kiba.

Konohamaru promptly covered his mouth. He had almost blown his cover.

Suddenly, he remembered that Kiba usually had a dog with him...and wondered where he had gone.

His question was answered when suddenly Akamaru pounced on top of him and started licking his face.

"Aaugh! Get off me!" demanded Konohamaru as the puppy tickled him with his tongue.

Suddenly, Konohamaru's ray gun was set off again...and this time it hit Shino, much to Kiba's concern.

"Are you OK?" inquired Kiba.

And much like Hinata before him, he started to act in a completely different manner.

"Of course I'm fine! Why are you asking me that?! Do I look like I'm in frail health to you?!" exclaimed Shino.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you!" apologized Kiba.

"Who is even in bad health in this town anyway?! We've got medical ninja all over the place! Just look at Tsunade!" bellowed Shino.

Kiba wondered what had happened to his friends. Both of them were acting very, very strangely. He had never recalled Shino to yell at people...let alone his own teammates.

Meanwhile, Konohamaru was laughing hysterically. So what if Naruto had told him not to play with the device he made? What he was doing was absolutely terrific!

He decided that maybe that he should zap Kiba, since at that particular point he was the only member of Team 8 that he hadn't already shot with his ray gun, excluding Kurenai, who thankfully was not on his hit list. He personally wondered what would happen if he ended up being zapped. Undoubtedly it would be hilarious like what happened to Hinata and Shino.

Suddenly, he realized that Akamaru was no longer licking his face. As it turns out, he was now with Kiba, and judging from the loud barks he was making he was trying to warn him about him and his gun.

"Huh? What is it, boy?" questioned Kiba.

Konohamaru sighed. Akamaru sure was a party pooper, trying to warn his owner about his plans. And to make matters worse his ray gun wasn't designed to work on animals.

But no matter. He could probably zap Kiba with his ray gun from a distance before Akamaru ever noticed him. Or maybe he could try zapping other genin besides Kiba. Maybe he could try zapping Naruto. There were just so many genin he could zap.

"Heh heh heh, this is going to be fun." chuckled Konohamaru.

Meanwhile, in the Fifth Hokage's Office...

"Hey Tsunade, how are you doing today?" inquired Shizune.

"Not so good. I just won a lot of money from a slot machine last night..." informed Tsunade.

"Oh dear...that's not a good sign, is it?" answered Tsunade's apprentice.

"No it's not...in fact, I feel that one of our own has betrayed us..." said the Fifth Hokage.

"OK, I admit it, I was the one that ate your ramen!" exclaimed Shizune.

"It's not you, Shizune! It's someone younger...I can feel it...though I wondered where that went. Why'd you do it Shizune?" inquired Tsunade.

"I was starving!" cried Shizune. "Please forgive me!"

"Well, you had better not do it again...otherwise I just might snack on you." answered the Sannin. "Now then, I suppose we should probably look for the guy who insists on betraying us..."

"But who could it possibly be?" inquired the Jonin.

"As for that, I have no idea." said Tsunade.

_Oh dear...it looks like Konohamaru has gone mad with power and is brainwashing our heroes for his own personal amusement...can he possibly be stopped?_

_And just who is he going to go after next? It could be anyone...he's already zapped Hinata and Shino, will he go after Kiba next? Or will he go after another genin team? Team 10? Team Guy? Naruto himself?_

_Personally, I'd like to see some suggestions...so feel free to leave a review...assuming of course you don't die laughing first...heh heh._


	2. Chapter 2: Terminal OOCness

Naruto Gone Wild

_Oh dear! It looks like Konohamaru has already gone mad with power...even though he's only zapped two genin at most at this particular moment._

_But guess what? In this chapter he's going to zap even more genin! Oh dear! Whose going to get zapped this time? And what's going to happen to Naruto himself? And will anyone else start to notice what Konohamaru is doing? Well, let me answer your questions..._

**Chapter 2: Terminal OOCness**

After telling Konohamaru that he shouldn't play with guns, let alone state-of-the-art guns, Naruto went home to enjoy another delicious bowl of ramen.

Yet for some strange reason, he got the feeling that there was someone waiting for him inside. Then again, maybe he was just losing his marbles.

Nonetheless, he decided not to trust his instinct and go home anyway. His precious ramen was waiting for his arrival and he couldn't wait to devour it. Om nom nom nom.

However, as soon as he went home, he heard strange noises...noises that appeared to be coming from his bedroom.

"Huh? Did somebody break in while I was away? Hmm..." wondered Naruto.

Curious, he decided to enter his bedroom to investigate. But much to his surprise, there appeared to be no-one there.

"Huh, I guess I must be losing my marbles..." he thought.

Suddenly, he heard a door locking behind him...and he then realized that he had fallen for a trap.

"What the-" he thought.

Curious, he turned around, and all of sudden, blood started squirting from his nose.

As it turns out, Hinata was standing there...and to say the very least, she was dressed rather immodestly. Naruto personally wondered why she wearing a swimsuit when there wasn't any swimming pool or beach nearby.

Also, he got the feeling that Konohamaru hadn't unzapped Hinata like he had told him to do, and wondered if he should yell at him for his disobedience.

But for now, he had worse problems to attend to.

"Um, hi Hinata...can I, uh, ask you why you, uh, locked us in the same room together...Just wondering...heh heh heh." asked Naruto nervously.

"Oh...I just wanted us...to have some alone time." answered Hinata.

"Alone time?" inquired Naruto.

Suddenly, Hinata grabbed Naruto and started hugging him tightly.

"I love you Naruto! I love you so much! We were destined to be together!" she squealed.

"We were?" inquired Naruto.

"Of course we were! I hope we get married one day!" exclaimed Hinata.

"OK..." answered the genin.

"Now give me a great big kiss!" squealed the kunochi.

"What are you-"

Suddenly, Hinata started kissing Naruto as hard as she possibly could...the genin tried to break free, but for some strange reason, her lips were like glue.

And eventually, Naruto fainted and collapsed on the floor.

"Oh dear...it looks like Naruto fainted...I guess I'm going to have to give him mouth-to-mouth! Hee hee hee hee hee!" exclaimed Hinata.

_Meanwhile in Kiba's residence..._

"So let me get this straight, Konohamaru's running around zapping people with his ray gun so that he can rewire our brains?" questioned Kiba.

Akamaru nodded his head.

"Wow...I'm actually impressed that he could build such a thing..."

Little did he know that at that particular moment, Konohamaru had targeted him as his next victim.

Immediately, Akamaru barked as loud as he could, trying to warn his master that he was in danger of becoming brainwashed.

"What? He's right behind m-"

Unfortunately, Kiba noticed Konohamaru too late, and he was immediately zapped with the ray gun, much to Akamaru's horror.

The puppy immediately checked to see if his master was alright.

"That's right! Come here boy! I've got something to show you!" bellowed Kiba.

Akamaru did as his master asked. But he got the strange feeling that something was wrong.

"That's right...come here...that's close enough...good! Now sit down!" demanded the boy.

The puppy nodded, and immediately sat down right in front of his master.

Suddenly, Kiba put on a scary-looking mask...and scared the heck out of the poor puppy.

"Ooga booga booga!" exclaimed Kiba, waving his arms as he did so.

Akamaru promptly whimpered and ran out of Kiba's house. He immediately let out an evil laugh.

"That was absolutely hilarious!" he exclaimed.

"You're a jerk." said an unknown voice.

Curious, Kiba looked behind him and noticed that for some strange reason, there appeared to be a talking pink dog in his house...that for some reason could stand on his hind legs. How was that possible?

Kiba was about to say something, but apparently that was all that the dog wanted to say to him, as he promptly left through the dog door Akamaru typically used.

"Stupid dog..." muttered Kiba as he looked for more animals to scare.

Meanwhile, Konohamaru pulled out his list of genin to zap, and crossed off Team 8.

"So far so good! Now then, which team should I go after next?" inquired the boy.

He then noticed that right underneath Team 8 on his list was Team 10...and all of a sudden, he knew which team he wanted to zap next.

"Team 10, ready or not, here I come!" squealed Konohamaru as he went to hunt his next victims.

_Around thirty minutes later..._

"Hey Kurenai, what's the matter?" inquired Asuma. As it turns out, Kurenai was feeling a bit depressed.

Kurenai sighed.

"It's just that my students have been acting so strange today..." said Kurenai.

"How so?" inquired Asuma.

"Well, Hinata's basically become a teenage Mei Terumi...Shino's started yelling everything he says at the top of his lungs...and just recently Kiba started scaring small animals...I think he even scared his own dog." said the kunochi.

"That's pretty odd." agreed Asuma.

"I know...have your students been acting strangely too?" inquired Kurenai.

"No, they've been acting pretty normal, actually. In fact, they're just outside ordering some lunch..." answered the male jonin.

Kurenai let out a sigh of relief.

Speaking of which, let's check on Team 10...

As Asuma had said to Kurenai, Team 10 was in fact eating some lunch. Unfortunately, one of them was slowing them down.

"Choji, do you mind? Ryo doesn't grow on trees...and I want to do some shopping!" inquired Ino.

"Just let me finish my last plate of barbecue..." said Choji.

"You've already had seven plates of them already..." pointed out Shikamaru.

"I'm sorry...I'm just so hungry today." apologized the chubby genin.

Ino sighed. Choji was always hungry. And he was getting his lunch all over his face too. Why couldn't he use a napkin?

"Just hurry up so that we can go..." complained Ino.

Meanwhile, Konohamaru was hiding at the top of a nearby tree, ready to snipe Team 10 with his ray gun. In fact, he was struggling not to roll on the floor laughing, since that would likely make him fall out of the tree and therefore blow his cover.

"Now they're just making this too easy! There's all sitting there waiting to be zapped!" he thought.

The only problem was that he couldn't decide who to zap first. Should he zap Shikamaru? Should he zap Ino? Should he zap Choji?

Suddenly, Konohamaru remembered how fat Choji was...meaning that out of the three he would be the easiest to hit. Not only that, he apparently was the reason they were sitting there in the first place, judging from how much food he was eating.

All of a sudden, he knew who he wanted to zap first.

"Hasta la vista!" exclaimed Konohamaru as he fired the ray gun.

_This can't be good for Team 10..._

Choji ravenously ate his lunch, happy to satisfy his enormous appetite.

As it turned out, Shikamaru had fallen asleep, while Ino was busy putting on some lipstick and looking at her face in a mirror. Apparently they had realized that he wasn't going to finish his lunch anytime soon.

Suddenly, Choji was zapped by the OOC Ray Gun. Immediately, his personality began to change.

"Good lord! How did I get so fat?! I have to go on a diet immediately!" bellowed Choji, who was now concerned about his weight.

Immediately, he left the food court, hoping that he could find some fruit or vegetables to eat...or maybe find a fat camp.

_Let's see if anyone noticed that._

"Did you see that?!" exclaimed Kurenai.

"What, what was it?" inquired Asuma.

"I could have sworn I saw a red beam striking one of your students..." said Kurenai.

"A red beam? You sure it wasn't just your imagination?" inquired Asuma.

"I don't know...maybe it was." answered the kunoichi.

"Did it hit anyone in particular?" asked the male jonin.

"It hit the chubby one, why?" answered Kurenai.

Curious, Asuma looked outside...and discovered that Choji was no longer sitting with Ino and Shikamaru. He promptly gasped.

"What is it?" inquired Kurenai.

"It's Choji! He's gone!" exclaimed Asuma.

"Wasn't he there a few minutes ago?" asked the powerful kunoichi.

"Hmm, I think you might be on to something, Kurenai..." agreed Asuma.

"Something strange is going on..." agreed Kurenai.

_Meanwhile at the food court..._

"Done and done! You look beautiful, girlfriend!" exclaimed Ino as she put her away her mirror and lipstick.

Looking around, she noticed that Shikamaru had fallen asleep. She promptly sighed.

"Darn it, now I'm going to have to wake him up...say, I wonder if Choji is done with his lunch..." said Ino.

Suddenly, she noticed that Choji had mysteriously left his seat...even more strangely, his lunch wasn't even finished.

"That's weird...Choji's never left a meal unfinished before...hey Shikamaru, wake up!" demanded Ino, shaking Shikamaru as she did so.

"What? What is it?" inquired the boy. "I was enjoying my nap..."

"It's Choji! He's disappeared! And he didn't even finish his lunch!" exclaimed Ino.

"What?! He didn't finish his lunch? That's impossible!" agreed Shikamaru.

"I know..." agreed Ino, staring at his half-eaten lunch.

"I'm going to go look for him! Stay here!" demanded Shikamaru.

Ino shrugged and decided to do as Shikamaru said.

"Choji! Where are you?" inquired the chunin as he went to look for his best friend in the world, leaving Ino alone in the process.

The psychic kunoichi promptly sighed. As annoying as her teammates could be, she actually felt rather bored without them.

"It's just not the same..." she thought.

She then noticed Choji's half-eaten lunch was still there...all of a sudden, she started feeling hungry.

"That Korean Barbecue sure looks good...but it might get to my thighs..." worried Ino.

However, as she continued to look at it, the harder it became to resist.

"Meh, maybe just one little bite..." said the psychic kunoichi as she pulled out a fork.

_Let's check on Shikamaru now..._

Shikamaru looked all over Konohagakure for his buddy Choji. Eventually, he found him in the last possible place he would look...a fitness center.

Raising an eyebrow, Shikamaru decided to investigate.

As it turns out, Choji was inside...and much to Shikamaru's shock he was running on a treadmill.

"Choji, what are you doing?!" exclaimed the chunin.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm trying to lose weight!" answered Choji.

"You're trying to lose weight?!" bellowed Shikamaru.

"Yeah! I'm tired of people calling me fat!" yelled the fat boy.

"I never called you fat..." answered the chunin.

"Well, pretty much everyone else did! I'm putting an end to it!" exclaimed Choji.

"Um, OK..." said Shikamaru as he left the fitness center.

_Meanwhile..._

Konohamaru at this point was almost dying of laughter. He had zapped four genin with his ray gun now...and he always seemed to have another victim waiting for him. In fact, he was about to zap Ino...when he noticed that she was eating Choji's barbecue like a pig.

"Um, did I already zap her? I can't remember..." said Konohamaru, who started scratching his head.

He was about to cross out Team 10, but for some strange reason he felt that he was forgetting someone...who could it possibly be?

Out of the blue, Shikamaru ran towards the food stall, trying to inform Ino about what had happened to Choji.

"Oh that's right...the lazy guy!" remembered Konohomaru as he readied his weapon.

Ino's cheeks immediately turned pink, and she frantically tried to wipe her face.

"Whoa...did you just eat Choji's lunch?" questioned Shikamaru, noticing that she had licked his plate clean.

"Um, maybe?" answered Ino sheepishly.

"Gee, maybe you should challenge Choji to an eating contest someday, Ino...you could probably give him a run for his ryo..." said Shikamaru.

"Yeah...maybe I should...wait, won't I become fat?" inquired Ino.

"Well, maybe you could use your chakra to make yourself skinny again or something..." said Shikamaru.

"You're right...maybe I could...hmm." wondered Ino.

Suddenly, Shikamaru was struck by Konohamaru's ray gun.

"Huh?" inquired Ino.

Immediately, Shikamaru started running around in circles.

"Yay! Look at me! I'm running around in circles! Isn't it awesome?!" exclaimed Shikamaru.

Ino raised an eyebrow. Why was Shikamaru so energetic all of a sudden? And why was he acting like a kid?

Suddenly, Akamaru ran by...apparently he was trying to get as far away from Kiba as possible now that he had started becoming cruel to animals.

"Yay! A puppy!" squealed Shikamaru as he chased after Akamaru.

"Gee...my teammates are acting even crazier than usual. Then again, I acted a little crazy myself today. Go figure." thought Ino as Shikamaru ran away.

Unfortunately for Konohamaru, Kurenai and Asuma both noticed the red light.

"That red light again!" exclaimed Kurenai.

"Something is going on here..." noted Asuma.

"Let's keep an eye out there then..." agreed the kunoichi.

Inside the tree, Konohamaru crossed out Team 10. He had hit six ninjas now...although personally he couldn't remember if he had already zapped Ino.

"Oh well, I'll just zap her again just to make sure." said Konohamaru as he readied his ray gun.

Sure enough, Ino was also zapped.

"Gee, all of a sudden I feel like kissing Sakura...I think I'll go do so now." said the psychic kunoichi as she left the area.

"Yes!" cheered Konohamaru.

"Hey! Up there!" shouted Asuma, pointing his finger at the young boy.

"Uh-oh!" exclaimed Naruto's apprentice.

And just like that, Konohamaru found himself being chased by two angry Jonin.

"Get back here!" demanded Kurenai.

"Never! You'll never get me alive!" bellowed the genin as he ran into the forest.

"Stop him!" yelled Asuma.

Asuma and Kurenai both chased Konohamaru into the woods...but unfortunately he managed to hide himself.

"Darn it, where did he go?" inquired Asuma.

"I guess we'll have to search in different directions..." stated Kurenai.

"Fair enough. You go that way and I'll go this way!" pointed Asuma.

Kurenai nodded, and the two of them began to search for Konohamaru.

But as it turned out, he was hiding inside a nearby cardboard box.

"Heh heh, they didn't notice me. Suckers." thought the boy.

Suddenly, he noticed that the three Team Guy members were busy training in that particular forest.

"What a coincidence, eh?" thought the boy. "Ah well, why question something that I like?"

And so, Konohamaru got ready to zap yet another ninja team...

_It looks like Konohamaru's OOC spree is going to come to an end soon...but will he zap a few last ninja before he goes down? How long is Hinata going to hug and kiss Naruto? And what will Tsunade do to Konohamaru for his fanfic atrocities?_

_Well, since I feel like leaving you on a cliffhanger...you'll have to find out in the last chapter!Mwahahaha!_

_Oh, and as before feel free to leave me a review._


	3. Chapter 3: Staying In Character

Naruto Gone Wild

_In the last chapter...Konohamaru has zapped four more genin...but guess what? A couple of jonin have caught him in the act...including his own uncle Asuma...so it looks like he's going to receive his just desserts soon..._

_But until then he's going to zap a few more genin...unfortunately, one of them is going to be immune to his ray gun's effects...well, relatively immune anyway. Tough luck for him. And yes, in this chapter he's going to get what's coming to him. His time of recognition has come at last! Well, OK...maybe not at last considering this is just a short story...but you still get the idea._

**Chapter 3: Staying In Character**

Konohamaru knew that he would have to be careful about who he zapped with his ray gun next, since his own uncle and his girlfriend were both searching for him.

Of course, it would have been easier not to zap any more genin at that point and simply go home and relax, but at this point the boy simply could not control himself.

"Let's see now...on this list is Neji, Rock Lee, and Tenten...which one should I zap first? I need to decide quickly though...before my uncle catches me!" thought Konohamaru.

Shrugging, he decided to fire at random and hope for the best.

Meanwhile, Neji was busy sparring with Rock Lee so that they could practice their taijutsu.

"Hiya!" exclaimed Rock Lee.

"Keep at it, you two!" ordered Might Guy.

"We will." answered Neji.

Since Neji and Rock Lee both were unable to bring themselves to hit a girl (well, Rock Lee was unable to do so anyway), Tenten was instead throwing kunai at some wooden targets. As usual, she got a bullseye every single time.

Suddenly, Neji got hit by Konohamaru's ray gun. Unsurprisingly, he immediately changed in personality...and stopped fighting Rock Lee.

"Er, are you exhausted, Neji? I do admit we've been dodging each other's punches for a while now..." inquired Rock Lee.

Suddenly, Neji grabbed Rock Lee and started hugging him tightly.

"You are like so hot! I can't believe you've noticed me! This is the best day of my life!" squealed the pale-eyed teen.

"Er, glad to hear it?" inquired the boy.

"Er, Neji? You OK?" inquired Might Guy.

Shortly afterwards, Rock Lee got hit with the ray gun too. He promptly glared at Might Guy.

"Er, is there something you want to tell me?" inquired Might Guy.

"You are stupid, you are stupid, you are stupid, and don't forget you are stupid!" bellowed Rock Lee as he crossed his arms.

"What did I ever do to him?" thought the jonin. "At least Tenten's interested in her training today..."

As usual, Konohamaru was laughing like a maniac...even though he should have been trying to hide from Asuma and Kurenai.

"Now to zap Tenten!" exclaimed the boy.

And so he did.

Suddenly, Tenten accidentally tossed a kunai at Might Guy...thankfully, he dodged in the nick of time.

"Hey! Watch where you're aiming!" demanded Might Guy.

"Sorry!" apologized Tenten.

Unfortunately for Konohamaru, as he found out, although Tenten could not hit the broad side of the barn anymore, the ray gun did not have much of an effect on her.

"Darn it! It must be broken or something!" bellowed the boy.

Becoming desperate, he started trying to zap Tenten as many times as he could.

"Um, Tenten, why are you glowing red all of a sudden?" inquired Might Guy.

"I don't know..." said Tenten as she accidentally tossed another kunai at her teacher.

"Hey! That one almost hit me!" bellowed the jonin.

"Sorry...I'm just having such a hard time aiming today..." said the genin.

Konohamaru was so frustrated. Why wasn't his ray gun affecting Tenten? Why did life have to be so cruel?

All of a sudden, he realized that he had accidentally tipped over the cardboard box he was hiding in. He began to panic.

"Oh man! I've got to get back into hiding before-"

"Gotcha!" exclaimed Asuma, grabbing Konohamaru by the back of his shirt.

"Nooooo!" bellowed Konohamaru.

Getting desperate, he tried to zap his own uncle with the ray gun to see if he would let him go...but for some strange reason, he couldn't seem to find it.

He knew that he had it in his own hands a few minutes ago...where could it have gone?

"Looking for something?" inquired Kurenai, who as it turned out had snatched the ray gun from him.

Konohamaru lowered his head in defeat.

"Well, off to see Tsunade then." said Asuma. "Sheesh, I can't believe my own nephew was behind all this..."

"I know...he's got a lot to answer for." agreed Kurenai.

_Around fifteen minutes later at Tsunade's Office..._

"Hmm, I'm getting a lot of reports about genin acting strangely lately...something's not right here..." said Tsunade.

"Tsunade, Sakura's here to see you." explained Shizune.

"Very well. Let her in." agreed Tsunade.

As usual, Shizune did as she was told.

As it turns out, Sakura Haruno had something rather interesting to say to her. She looked rather freaked out.

"Yes, what is it? You look like you've seen a ghost...or maybe a zombie...or maybe Orochimaru himself..." inquired the fifth Hokage.

"Ino kissed me!" exclaimed Sakura Haruno.

Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Wait, what?"

"She said that she had been longing to do it for years! I was saving my lips for Sasuke, too! Why is life so unfair!" cried out Sakura.

"Isn't he a missing-nin now?" inquired Shizune.

"Love is blind!" she belloewd.

"Ah yes...I've had numerous reports about genin acting crazy lately...I wonder what's gotten into them..." said Tsunade.

"Mistress Tsunade!" exclaimed Asuma, knocking it on the door.

"Huh? What is it now? I already have a guest at the moment..." said the sannin.

"We've got something we need to show you!" exclaimed Kurenai.

"Very well. Let them in too..." shrugged Tsunade.

Shizune nodded and agreed to let Asuma and Kurenai inside. Much to Tsunade's surprise, Asuma was holding Konohamaru in his hands, and Kurenai was holding a rather strange-looking device in his hands.

"My nephew's been using some strange sort of ray gun to brainwash people into humilating themselves or something...basically, it causes them to act in ways that they normally wouldn't even dream about doing..." said Asuma.

"Put me down!" demanded Konohamaru.

"OK...would you care to show me a demonstration?" inquired Tsunade, raising an eyebrow.

Asuma nodded, and beckoned Kurenai to zap his nephew with the gun.

"Let's see...how does this work again?" inquired the kunoichi.

Suddenly, the ray gun went off...zapping Konohamaru much like he had zapped the genin earlier.

"Oh, I get it now, I just hit this button...of course." said Kurenai.

Sure enough, Konohamaru stopped struggling, and began to act very, very weird.

"I love unicorns and ponies and glitter and cute little fairies! I love them to pieces! They are just so adorable! I just can't get enough of them!" bellowed Konohamaru.

"OK, I think you've made your point." nodded the fifth Hokage.

"There wouldn't happen to be a way to reverse it, would there?" asked Shizune.

Curious, Kurenai noticed that there appeared to be a switch on the ray gun...one side of it said OOC, while the other read IC.

"Hmm...let's see what IC does, I guess." said the kunoichi as she flipped the switch and activated the ray gun again.

Suddenly, rather than a red beam, a green beam came out of the ray gun. And sure enough, it zapped Konohamaru once more.

"Did it work?" inquired Asuma.

"Well, he's struggling to break free again." informed Shizune.

"Let me go! I want to make more genin go crazy!" demanded Konohamaru.

"I guess he's back to normal then..." said Kurenai.

"Well, now we know how to put an end to all of this nonsense." noted Tsunade.

"Can I have him for a moment?" asked Sakura.

"What? Sure, I suppose." agreed the Sannin.

Immediately, Sakura grabbed Konohamaru and lifted him by the collar of his shirt...and shortly afterwards, she scared the heck out of him.

"Never...make me...kiss a girl...again!" roared Sakura at the top of her lungs.

Konohamaru promptly whimpered.

"Do you understand me?!" exclaimed the genin, shaking him back and forth.

"Yes, we're clear!" cried out the traumatized boy.

Sakura dropped Konohamaru to the ground and panted for breath.

"Take it easy with him! He's my nephew, you know!" exclaimed Asuma.

"Believe me Sarutobi, I would have done much worse. Now then, I want you two to find the affected genin and use the ray gun to turn them back to normal. " ordered Tsunade.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" nodded Asuma and Kurenai, saluting the Fifty Hokage with respect as they left.

"Konohamaru, since you're the one responsible for all this, I want you to do a D-Rank Mission for all the genin you've zapped with your little toy once Asuma and Kurenai are finished cleaning up the mess you made." said Tsunade.

"What? But that will take forever!" demanded Konohamaru.

Tsunade raised an eyebrow.

"Would you rather I have Sakura decide the punishment?" inquired the Sannin.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" saluted Konohamaru.

"Shizune, since you ate my delicious ramen, I want you to give me your slurpee." demanded Tsunade.

"But I like my slurpee..." complained Shizune as she sipped it.

"Would you rather I sell your slurpee machine for gambling money?" inquired the Sannin.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" saluted the kunoichi as she handed Tsunade her slurpee.

"Sakura, since you hate Konohamaru so much, I want you to make a voodoo doll of him so that we can keep him in line." said the Fifth Hokage.

"But I don't know how to make a voodoo doll..." answered Sakura.

Tsunade handed Sakura a kinjutsu scroll.

"Ah...so that's how you make one..." answered the apprentice.

"Mm-hmm...and before you do that, I want you to give me a military salute." said Tsunade.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" saluted Sakura.

Tsunade let out a sigh of relief.

"Hopelessly now this nightmare will come to an end..." thought Tsunade.

_A few minutes later..._

Hinata was having the best day of her life trying to resucicate Naruto. The only problem was that he apparently was in a coma.

"Oh dear...I've got to find a way to snap him out of it..." thought Hinata. "Maybe if I rip his shirt off, then maybe he'll wake up!"

"Alright, freeze!" ordered Asuma.

Hinata immediately lifted her hands in the air.

"Am I under arrest? I'm too young to go to jail!" exclaimed Hinata.

"And you're too young to be dressed like that in public. But no, you're not under arrest...we just need you to come to your senses." said Kurenai.

Hinata let out a sigh of relief. She didn't know what she would do if the fuzz ever came for her.

"This might come as a shock to you though." warned Kurenai as she fired the ray gun.

"Wait, what?" she inquired.

Shortly afterwards, Hinata was hit by a green beam...but thankfully she did not die, though once she returned to her senses she immediately felt like she was going to die from embarrasment.

"What am I doing? Why am I in Naruto's bedroom? Why am I wearing this skimpy red bikini?! And why is Naruto lying down next to me?! Aah!" exclaimed Hinata.

Suffice to say, this was more than enough to make the poor kunoichi collapse on the floor...oddly enough, she collapsed right next to Naruto.

"Oh dear...she really let herself go...didn't she?" questioned Asuma.

"Should we give her some clothes? That swimsuit of hers is making me feel a little uncomfortable..." asked Kurenai.

"Sure..." said Asuma.

_A few minutes later..._

"There...she's all dressed now." said the male jonin.

"Should we take her back home? Her father might be worried about her..." pointed out Kurenai.

"I don't know...I think we wasted enough time protecting her modesty as it is...and besides, I think they actually look kind of cute together..." answered Asuma.

"You have a surprisingly good point there...I suppose we should probably look for the other genin...according to this list, we've still got several more ninja to go..." said the kunoichi.

And so, the two jonin left Naruto's house, thus leaving Hinata and Naruto in each other's arms.

_A few minutes later in the library..._

"Why do you keep yelling? This is a library! Try to calm down, will you?" inquired the librarian.

"Don't tell me to calm down! Why don't you calm down! You're driving me crazy!" bellowed Shino.

Suddenly, bugs started leaking out of Shino's mouth. Apparently they hated the noise as much as the librarian did, and they had decided to leave his body.

"Oh, now look what you've done! My bugs! My precious bugs!" cried Shino.

"Whoops?" questioned the librarian.

As before, Asuma and Kurenai came by to free a genin from Konohamaru's control.

"We're here to unbrainwash you, Shino!" exclaimed Asuma.

"I've been brainwashed?! Gosh darn it! Why didn't you tell me b-"

Kurenai hit him with the ray gun before he could talk any longer.

Suddenly, Shino started coughing.

"Did it work?" Asuma inquired.

The genin tried to say something...but as it turned out, he had lost his voice.

"Why...does my throat feel so sore?" inquired Shino weakly.

"You got brainwashed and started yelling at people...my nephew wreaked havoc across town and now we're trying to undo the damage he's done." explained Asuma.

Shino nodded his head.

"Is anyone else you know acting unusual?" inquired Kurenai.

The genin nodded, and wrote down Kiba's name.

"We'll get right on it." agreed Asuma.

Shino sighed in relief.

A few minutes later...outside Kiba's residence...

"That's right squirrel! Get away from me you stupid little beast!" bellowed Kiba as he chased an innocent squirrel across his lawn.

Suffice to say it didn't take long for Asuma and Kurenai to notice him.

"Sheesh...Konohamaru sure made him vicious, didn't he?" inquired Kurenai.

"Yeah...I'm not sure how we're going to get him to hold still..." noted Asuma.

"Maybe we could give him one of Akamaru's dog bones?" questioned the kunoichi.

Sure enough, one of them was lying outside on the lawn. Apparently the puppy had left it behind as he ran away from his owner.

"Hey Kiba! Fetch!" exclaimed Kurenai.

Kiba nodded and grabbed the bone with his mouth. Pretty soon he started chewing it.

Kurenai then hit him with the ray gun.

Suddenly, Kiba noticed what he was doing, and promptly spat it out.

"Why am eating my own dog's lunch? Sheesh, I wonder what came over me..." said Kiba.

"Let's just say that my nephew needs to control himself." explained Asuma.

"Well, that's my team down...should we go after yours next?" inquired Kurenai.

"You know me too well." answered the jonin.

_Time to save Team 10..._

Choji was rather happy to say the very least. Although he had eaten at least fifty pounds of junk food over the last month or so, his doctor told him that it wouldn't be long before he would complete his diet and become a far less obese teen.

"Woohoo!" cheered Choji.

He was about to leave the ninja hospital...when suddenly he noticed his master along with his girlfriend waiting for him.

"Um, hi?" questioned the fat boy.

"Choji, you've been mesmerized. We need to zap you with this ray gun so you'll act normal again." explained Asuma.

"Oh, OK." answered the genin.

Kurenai promptly zapped Choji in the stomach. Immediately, he started to feel hungry.

"I'm starving...do you have anything for me to eat?" inquired the genin.

"We have this bag of potato chips..." said Kurenai.

Choji promptly grabbed them out of her hand and started eating them ravenously.

"Om nom nom nom nom!" he bellowed.

"Well, one down, two to go." said Asuma.

_Let's check on Shikamaru...whose IQ has unfortunately reached zero..._

"I love you! You are so freaking cute! Give me a hug!" cheered Shikamaru as he hugged Akamaru.

Akamaru thought being hugged by Shikamaru was nice...but at the same time he was worried about his owner. For some strange reason, he had gone insane and had started abusing animals.

Suddenly, Shikamaru started licking Akamaru in the face. The puppy promptly shuddered...and began to wonder why he started licking people in the first place.

Thankfully, before Shikamaru could lick him for long, Asuma and Kurenai arrived on the scene.

"Ah Shikamaru! There you are! I was worried about you! How am I going to play shogi with you if you've become a total ditz?" inquired Asuma.

"Look Asuma! Lollipops are raining from the sky!" yelled Shikamaru.

"Yeah...lollipops. Sure, lots and lots of lollipops." answered Kurenai.

"We need you to hold still so Kurenai can change you back." said the jonin.

Shikamaru nodded and promptly sat down.

As before, Kurenai used the ray gun to cure Konohamaru's unfortunate victim.

"Ugh...why do I have such a headache? And why do I have dog fur on my tongue?" inquired the boy.

"You got brainwashed into acting really, really dumb...and then you started licking Akamaru." said Asuma.

Noticing Akamaru, Kurenai informed him that his master had been restored to normal and that he wouldn't have to worry about Kiba frightening him anymore. Akamaru must have understood, because he licked her in the face and ran towards home.

"Wow...today's been a crazy day, hasn't it?" inquired Shikamaru.

"I'm afraid so. It feels like Bedlam..." answered Kurenai.

"Where is Ino?" inquired Asuma.

"She's right over there." answered Shikamaru.

Curious, Asuma and Kurenai decided to walk over to her...and blood started leaking from their noses.

As it turns out, Ino was painting a picture of Sakura...while she was in a hot spring.

"Oh man! We've got to change her back now!" exclaimed Asuma.

"I'm on it!" exclaimed Kurenai as she zapped Ino.

Immediately, Ino came back to her senses.

"What the-why am I drawing a picture of Sakura? And why is she-ugh! What came over me!" bellowed Ino.

"Don't blame yourself Ino. My nephew has too much time on his hands it seems." answered Asuma.

Suddenly, Ino started eating some of Choji's chocolate.

"Er, are you sure you zapped her, Kurenai? I don't ever recall her ever eating Choji's food..." inquired Asuma.

"I'm pretty sure I did..." said Kurenai.

"Er, yeah...turns out I had a far bigger appetite than I thought...heh heh." answered Ino. "And for some strange reason...no matter how much I eat...it doesn't fatten me up...lucky me eh?"

"Hey you! Yeah you!" exclaimed Choji.

Ino's face turned white.

"Um, hi Choji...er, I thought you were going on a diet!" answered Ino nervously.

"Well I was...but guess what? It turns out I was brainwashed by a freaking ray gun! Know anything about that?" he bellowed.

"I'm innocent! It was Konohamaru! He's the one that brainwashed you! I just noticed that you had left your bag of food behind...and well, I got hungry! Can you forgive me?" apologized Ino.

"I see..." answered Choji. "Well then, I guess there's only one thing to do now..."

Ino raised an eyebrow.

"I challenge you to an eating contest!" bellowed the boy.

"Wait, what?" inquired Ino.

"Meet me tommorrow at the Yakinuku Q!" demanded Choji.

"Um...sure." nodded the kunoichi.

"Er, there might be a problem with that..." said Shikamaru.

"What?" inquired Choji and Ino.

"You see...due to the fact we ended up being attacked by Konohamaru...none of us paid our bill!" explained Shikamaru.

"Aarghhh!" bellowed the Yakinuku Q manager.

Team 10 looked around, and discovered that a rather muscular-looking man was standing a short distance from them.

"How dare you not pay the bill! Now you're going to have to pay for it...with your blood!" he bellowed.

Team 10 screamed in horror and ran as far away as they could, with the manager of course in hot pursuit.

"Oh dear...should we give them a hand?" inquired Kurenai.

"I'm sure that they can deal with it themselves. Besides, we've still got a mission to complete." said Asuma.

"Oh, right." remembered the kunoichi.

A few minutes later...

"So, your ninja students have gone crazy too, then?" inquired Asuma.

"I'm afraid so...Neji's wearing a woman's dress, Rock Lee's throwing kunai at a picture of me...and Tenten, well, she's acting surprisingly normal...but her aiming skills are now abysmal!" explained Might Guy.

"I see..." answered Asuma.

"You want us to zap your students with Konohamaru's ray gun so that we can turn them back to normal?" inquired Kurenai.

"You have my permission!" answered Might Guy.

"That's what we wanted to hear." nodded Asuma.

As it turns out, Neji was still trying to flirt with Rock Lee.

"Come on! Why won't you notice me!" exclaimed Neji.

"Not now...I'm throwing kunai at Might Guy's ugly face..." answered the martial artist.

"Can I practice kunai throwing with you guys?" inquired Tenten.

"Sure, why not." agreed Rock Lee.

Unfortunately for Rock Lee, Tenten ended up completely unintentionally throwing it at his shoulder.

"Ow! Ow! Ow!" exclaimed the boy.

"Oh dear...you're hurt...can I kiss it to make it better?" inquired Neji.

"Actually, it's just a graze...no big deal." answered Rock Lee.

"Aww!" cried Neji.

"Rock Lee, please forgive me..." apologized Tenten.

At that particular moment, Kurenai was getting ready to fire the blaster.

"I wonder what happens if I hold down the button..." thought Kurenai.

Suddenly, an enormous green beam came out of the ray gun...and hit all three of Team Guy at once.

"Why didn't I think of that before?" inquired Kurenai.

Immediately, all three members of Team Guy came to their senses.

"Why am I wearing a dress?" inquired Neji.

"Why am I throwing darts at a picture of Might Guy?" inquired Rock Lee.

"Oddly enough I don't really have any questions..." said Tenten.

"I'm just glad Konohamaru never thought of doing that...otherwise we might have had an even worse situation on our hands." agreed Asuma.

"I just wonder why the kunoichi wasn't affected as bad as her teammates ..." questioned Kurenai.

"Maybe because she's a flat character?" inquired Asuma.

"What?" asked Kurenai.

"Never mind." answered Asuma.

"There's just one last thing left to do now..." said the kunoichi.

"What is it?" inquired the male jonin.

Kurenai kissed Asuma on the cheek.

"Oh right...that, heh heh." answered Asuma.

A few minutes later...

"Did you cure the genin?" inquired Tsunade.

"Yes we did. We've completed the mission." answered Asuma.

"Good. Konohamaru, it's time for you to begin your community service." said the sannin.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" saluted Konohamaru.

"And when you're finished with that, go give me a back rub. My back's starting to feel sore." continued Tsunade.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" saluted Konohamaru again. He then went to exit the building.

"I'm just glad this is finally over." said Tsunade.

"I agree...I was starting to worry that there were body snatchers invading our village or something." nodded Shizune.

"What should we do with the ray gun?" questioned Kurenai.

"I'll be confiscating it. Leave it on my desk." said Tsunade.

Kurenai nodded and handed Tsunade the ray gun.

"You two are excused now." said the Fifth Hokage.

Asuma and Kurenai nodded as they left her office.

"Is Sakura still working on making that voodoo doll?" inquired Shizune.

"Yes, she is..." said Tsunade. "Now if you excuse me I'm going to take a nap..."

"But Tsunade, shouldn't you be working?" inquired Shizune.

Tsunade zapped Shizune with the ray gun.

"Wait, what was I saying? You should get some sleep! You look tired!" exclaimed Shizune.

Tsunade promptly smiled. Konohamaru was a boy genius.

_Well, the OOCness is finally over...Konohamaru's been punished for his brainwashing spree and his victims have been restored to normal...hopefully now things won't be so crazy..._

_I hope you enjoyed this brief Naruto fanfic...and I hope that you don't play with guns like Konohamaru did...those things are dangerous._

_So, I guess I'll be seeing you later! Toodles!_


End file.
